Leadership is Feminine: Arguing with Team Members

Leadership is Feminine

For most women, when we are invited to study leadership the teachers, scholars, authorities and models are primarily… men. We are indoctrinated from the time we are born that men are the leaders and that natural male characteristics are the strengths you must also possess to be a good leader. Powerful. Strong. Authoritative. Direct. Assertive. Decisive. These and so many more are attributes that are typically associated with the male model of a leader. And so, for the better part of the last one hundred years as women have made their way into the fold, in a variety of leadership roles, we have learned and studied to walk the way of a men to achieve success. Women dismiss their own knowing because we’ve been so indoctrinated in male leadership models. We dismiss what we know for what others tell us to be and how to be seen. There is another way to lead. To be in alignment. To not feel like an imposter. It’s time for the reimagining of leadership. That’s not to disparage any of the progress that has come before us. Progress is progress. For those of us who stand in the footsteps of the women who came before us we are here because of their courage, bravery and resilience. I wonder instead if women equally looked to the characteristics they learned from their mothers for leadership. I wonder if we were taught to lean on different qualities to drive success. I wonder what might happen then? The traditional qualities of mothering are communication, nurturing, listening, strength, support, grace, and yes… love. What if to be the best leader you can be as a woman, you integrated the best of both? This is how women will stand with integrity in their role as leaders. As women, we can be assertive, direct, powerful, and authoritative but we need not only rely on those attributes for success. After 25 years of watching and studying leaders, I can tell you that for sure many traditional male attributes are effective in the short run, but they typically only serve a few. Whereas, when leadership is feminine. When the leader possesses the strengths of femininity and grace the results are for all. This podcast is my like my gentle request and invitation to my fellow female leaders that we reclaim the world leadership as one that is a feminine definition. That we continue to work with all of our allies to build organizations and systems that include more support, collaboration, grace and communication. And that we do so not because we are uncomfortable with the more traditional male-dominating models, but because we truly do know that leadership is a feminine strength and attribute. And the world needs more of us leading. Now more than ever.

Leadership is Feminine

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Arguing with Team Members | Ep #109 0

Mar 15, 2021

We all deal with the emotion of anger every now and then. There's nothing wrong with that. But we don't have to work out our anger with other people.

As leaders, sometimes we forget that we already command authority just because of our role - our title. We automatically carry the biggest stick, and arguing for us, is not a good look. It doesn't create a constructive culture, and I believe as leaders, there is no place for us to participate in that. Ever.

So, let’s talk about how not to indulge an arguer – and how not to be one ourselves.

What you'll learn from this episode:

Much of our perspective about how to communicate comes from our family of origin.
What’s considered “arguing.”
What to do in that moment – instead of indulging the “arguer.”
How to deal with someone on the team who is an arguer.
What to do if you are the arguer.
Arguing as a form of manipulation.

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